Wednesday, July 21, 2010

On Fun

Neanderthal

 

Awoke on this fine morning to the clamor of the day
i stepped in side my living room and wished id run away
As I looked around the devastation, the chaos and debris
I heard five guilty voices… their pleas “it wasn’t me”





Well heck… I guess I slept so sound last night… I guess I didn’t know
A localized hurricane… was whipping up a blow
Sweet hubby with his blatant charm, offered to set it right
It doesn’t matter... I smiled sweetly, you still get non tonight





All day I had to listen, to the repetition of his woe
I murmured placating comments… as I thought where he could go
He actually tried conversing with all the elegance of an ape
He started sounding reasonable… guess its time to medicate





I got these pretty pink pills… to help me make it through
“But seeing as how you’re the biggest cause… should I be giving them to you”
Perhaps if he were sedated… I wouldn’t be at beck and call
Perhaps I was mistaking…
to marry a neanderthal





........(hubby number one (i number them because its just easier that way).. used to invite his buddys around for drinking sessions all the time.... and they would basically trash the place leaving guess who to pick up the pieces.. if that wasnt bad enough he'd also sit there can in hand staring at the t.v letting the kids wreck havoc.....also inspired by him my version of the 12 days of xmas.)



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romantic nights







dishes piled high...with in the sink
your suppers late... thats bad you think
your storming off... in a royal mood
screaming orders... for some food





complaining hard... that suppers late
im reaching now.... for that new cleaned plate
i smile sweetly... as i dish your food
the puppy cleaned it ... really good





i listen to... your vast complaints
as i clear away... your emptied plate
your full of shit... but not for long
laxative stew... do you think thats wrong?





it was over salted... and and dosed up well
i hand you coffee... and you cant tell
thirst is quenched... but its full of spit
because im tired ..of your constant shit





your playing cards... on computer screen
ignoring me... but i wont be mean
i watch the clock.. as i wait and smile
the laxative.. will be just a while





your belly rolls... and you clench your cheeks
an hour later.. the bathroom reeks
and yet still... you are... so full of crap
but dont worry dear... cos ill get you back





bed time's near... and you think we'll play
but no way darlin... theres non today
a final coffee...and you drink it gone
that was a doze of trazadone





feeling drowsy... you've your teeth to do
with that very same brush... that i cleaned the loo
so nag complain and bitch and squeal
ill smile sweetly.. as you call to heel





now snoring hard ...to wake the dead
your belly empty... though you were fed
i grab my pillow... as i ponder through
what the law would do ... if i smothered you



........(hubby number two... turned out to be a total control freak, after id signed on the dotted line of course... and if your wondering how i could be an idiot twice theres a post knocking around some where that explains how you fall into that mind set... any way i wrote this as i was starting to feel quite ill (was after, i think, the second procedure (i lose track). i was supposed to be on bed rest but he wouldnt stop whining, complaining, bitching about everything .... did i really do all those things or am i using creative licence .... hell yes i did them... i was sick of his bullying... petty pay back like that kept me sane.. if you think that was bad you should hear what i did after the separation lol...yes i am an wicked mean evil woman.)
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hmm makes me look a bit of a bitch really huh need something else for balance perhaps?
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2 comments:

  1. o_O

    Makes me grateful that I broke up with my boyfriend before our relationship got to be too "serious."

    (Don't take that in a wrong way. I see some humor in the writing.)

    -French Bean

    ReplyDelete
  2. lol .. guess i should put up some non tainted humor though huh ;-)

    ReplyDelete