Tuesday, July 27, 2010

On Songs

Darkness calls


isolated by your side
as darkness cloaks,
(sibilant whisper)envelops... the mind (sibilant whisper)
hearts close, as roles defined
alone..
and yet...
fates intertwined
primeval instincts taint the kind
(sibilant whisper) survival left, the only line (sibilant whisper)
so
bring up defences
and build up the walls
(back ground) the assault is upon us all (back ground)
(all) and darkness calls (all)
the time is for standing
theres no time to fall (pause 2,3,4...)

(all) and darkness calls (all)


no time left
to fly the heart free
(sibilant whisper) no will left its deserting me (sibilant whisper)
no hope no chance, theres nothing to see
no where to go and nothing to be
(back ground) forsake the mind for insanity (back ground)
(sibilant whisper) lost within deep despondency(sibilant whisper)

so.....

bring up defences
and build up the walls
(back ground) the assault is upon us all (back ground)
(all) and darkness calls (all)
the time is for standing
theres no time to fall (pause 2,3,4...)

(all) and darkness calls (all)

the enemys upon us
within our midst
one step taken
the other missed
wanton destruction
from the one i kissed
the final betrayal
the final twist

so......

bring up defences
and build up the walls
the assault is upon us all
and darkness calls
the time is for standing
theres no time to fall (pause 2,3,4...)
**************************
and darkness calls (fade out)

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mind merge

Minds merge… across an ocean wave
As two souls… meet as one
Untangle threads of mystery
New tapestry… begun

Hesitant eyes opened
To hopes and thought and dreams
To understand the darkness
The light the shadows…. In between

You took my hand and led me…
From darkest night… to shinning day
You took my heart and held me…
Even though your far away

Our hearts are joined… through flickering screen
Past treachery undone
New strength is found…from out your heart
New melody is sung

You took my hand and led me…
From darkest night… to shinning day
You took my heart and held me…
Even though you far away

Sought… from out dark gathering
You offered… to lead the way
Soft words to soothe the fractured mind
To hold the crowds at bay

To know the strength in loving you
The joy the sorrow it can mean
You took the time to look at me
To know nothings, as it seems

You took my hand and led me…
From darkest night… to shinning day
You took my heart and held me…
Even though you far away

But as evening falls… our voices part
I feel your presence fade
The emptiness of missing you
Of wishing you had stayed


where are you


the darkness falls around me
and theres no where left to go
the darkness starts to bind me
im a long long way from home

where are youuuuuu
i need you by my side
where are youuuuuu
iv no place to confide

the demons haunt my mind and soul
they take me far away
the echo of your laughter
and the games you used to play

the darkness starts to take me
as the memorys start to fade
regrets soon overwhelm me
and i wish that you had stayed

where are youuuuuu
i need you by my side
where are youuuuuu
theres no place left to hide

the wheels keep on turning
as the road keeps flashing by
can feel my heart still yearning
but i dont enjoy this ride

i thought to out run memory
i thought to out run grief
i thought that i could out run death
and a life that was to brief

where are youuuuuu
i need you by my side
where are youuuuuu
now that a part of me has died

the echos of your laughter
still float upon the breeze
as memory fade
the hints remain
of the life we held to brief

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lady love walking out on me

i saw my lady love
down on the shore
she was lost in love
reaching out for more

and as i closed my eyes
it was then i could see
how much i needed her
and what she meant to me

i watched those waves roll out
heading back to the sea
and i see my lady love
walk away from me

oh baby
wont you come home
oh baby
back where you belong
then as i close my eyes
i can only pretend
that id been what she needed most
that id been a friend

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the raven

the raven how she rocked you
i dont know how she made it though
once more she took good care of you
and then she up and flew

the red head how she bled you
she lied with what she said to you
she mislead and she hurt you
and now the fires gone

the baby carriage took you
but the wedding song was wrong to do
she cheated and she stole from you
now the heart has hurt so long

but no matter if you make it through
or if you feel its time to do
you cant find another lover
till the other lovers gone

the past was made to seal and heal
before old scars were meant to feel
you got to let it fade away
to let another stay

move one to tomorrow
dont let the shadows follow
cos you cant find another lover
till the other lovers gone

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in the moonlight

in the moon light
when i watch you drive away
in the soft light
whilst im wishing you could stay
hidden head lights
catch the tears upon my face
in the moon light
forbidden moments we must chase

as i watch you drive away
i feel my heart begin to fade
as the shadows grow
and the dark will soon invade
as i watch you drive away
and in my heart i cry out ............... stay

in the moon light
with the tears upon my cheek
in the soft light
as i feel myself grow weak
hidden head lights
catch the words i can not speak
in the moonlight
my heart breaks till we next meet


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castle round my heart


I can feel the walls… rebuilding
Round the castle… to my heart
You felt so close fear held me
Till… we finally we moved apart
Each time I felt… your heart beat
Or your touch… upon my skin
I could feel the tide returning
Felt the warmth… held deep with in
Did you feel emotion calling?
Did you feel… the empty space?
Did you feel the walls rebuilding?
Did you feel… the slightest trace?
did I ever hear you whisper
Calling softly out my name
Now I feel the walls rebuilding
Will it ever feel the same?

I feel my hands… they tremble
As I wait upon your call
Each moment… I wait fearing
Building yet another wall
Confusion… flows around me
As I hesitate… to say
Will I ever hear you whisper
Could you ever really stay?
Could you feel emotion stirring
Could you feel my empty space
Could you feel my walls rebuilding
Could you feel the slightest trace
will I ever hear you whisper
Calling softly out my name
Now I feel the walls rebuilding
do you ever feel the same?

I could never… hold the promise
To open up… my heart
Confused and lonely’s… how I feel
Fear… lost within the dark
I know how much I miss you
Every moment your not there
Could I ever really tell you
Would I ever really dare
Do you feel emotion calling?
Do you feel… the empty space?
Do you feel the walls rebuilding?
Do you feel… the slightest trace?
Could I ever hear you whisper
Calling softly out my name
Now I feel the walls rebuilding
Will love ever… feel the same?

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moonlight walks

Moonlight walks and starlight skies
Those stolen moments last good-byes
A lingering loving final parting kiss
.
The time is drawing nearer
When we soon will have to part
This lonely crushing sorrow
Feeling lost within the dark

so
Save a corner of your heart for me
A part that’s always there
A promise that you never will forget

I’ll keep a portion of my soul for you
And hold it in my heart
My thought my hopes my dreams of you
For when were far apart

Through lonely days and rain filled skies
Through troubled moments and family ties
“Remember how we danced within the dark”

Save a corner of your heart for me
A part that’s always there
A promise that you never will forget

Those moon light walks and starlight skies
Our stolen moments soon flew bye
Remember how we cherished every time

So save corner of your heart for me
A part that’s always there for me
And promise
That you never
Will
Forget

######################################

Thank you

You walked from out of darkness
Chasing shadows far away
Your voice the sound of reason
Kept the nightmares safe at bay

Such warmth held in your loving
I felt the heat course through my soul
The waking of my dead heart
Though your loving took a toll

Quickened heart and captured breath
Kisses color a pale cheek
My thoughts turn to my sweetheart
As I smile… finally… within my sleep

You are my smile in the rain
You are my thought that keeps the clouds at bay
You bring the joy that hides the pain
You are my sunshine in the rain

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fires

fires grow, from with in the soul
built from the embers... held within the heart
i need to feel right next to you
even though were miles apart

the fleeting time we spend together
can barely help me bear
the emptiness i feel within
when i know... that you are over there

the miles that stretch between us
makes me wonder if we should
but within the dark of lonely night
your memory’s make me feel... so good

i know though miles part us
whilst you live so far away
to be held close within your heart
is where i want to stay



#########################################


when you walk away

when you leave my side,
and you walk away
a part of me is dying ...whilst the rest of me is crying
wishing you could stay

when you walk away

when im all alone
not by your side
i can feel the emptiness... of the part thats died

when im all alone
and theres no one home
and i cant feel you any more
do you miss... me im not sure

the doubts that flood my mind
will the distance find
that your no longer mine
and i cry.....

when you leave my side
and you walk away
and a part of me is dying.... whilst the rest of me is crying
wishing you could stay

and i wonder any way
as the darkness falls
and the loneliness calls
were we meant to be
for all eternity

could we ever be......
side by side for ever, with a certainty
when you leave my side
and you walk away
a part of me is dying .... whilst the rest of me is crying....
please just stay
dont go away
dont leave me here
full of doubt and fear
by your side i know ill make it
with your help no one can take it

if im by your side
ill know...
i wont of died





Wednesday, July 21, 2010

On Fun

Neanderthal

 

Awoke on this fine morning to the clamor of the day
i stepped in side my living room and wished id run away
As I looked around the devastation, the chaos and debris
I heard five guilty voices… their pleas “it wasn’t me”





Well heck… I guess I slept so sound last night… I guess I didn’t know
A localized hurricane… was whipping up a blow
Sweet hubby with his blatant charm, offered to set it right
It doesn’t matter... I smiled sweetly, you still get non tonight





All day I had to listen, to the repetition of his woe
I murmured placating comments… as I thought where he could go
He actually tried conversing with all the elegance of an ape
He started sounding reasonable… guess its time to medicate





I got these pretty pink pills… to help me make it through
“But seeing as how you’re the biggest cause… should I be giving them to you”
Perhaps if he were sedated… I wouldn’t be at beck and call
Perhaps I was mistaking…
to marry a neanderthal





........(hubby number one (i number them because its just easier that way).. used to invite his buddys around for drinking sessions all the time.... and they would basically trash the place leaving guess who to pick up the pieces.. if that wasnt bad enough he'd also sit there can in hand staring at the t.v letting the kids wreck havoc.....also inspired by him my version of the 12 days of xmas.)



##################################################
romantic nights







dishes piled high...with in the sink
your suppers late... thats bad you think
your storming off... in a royal mood
screaming orders... for some food





complaining hard... that suppers late
im reaching now.... for that new cleaned plate
i smile sweetly... as i dish your food
the puppy cleaned it ... really good





i listen to... your vast complaints
as i clear away... your emptied plate
your full of shit... but not for long
laxative stew... do you think thats wrong?





it was over salted... and and dosed up well
i hand you coffee... and you cant tell
thirst is quenched... but its full of spit
because im tired ..of your constant shit





your playing cards... on computer screen
ignoring me... but i wont be mean
i watch the clock.. as i wait and smile
the laxative.. will be just a while





your belly rolls... and you clench your cheeks
an hour later.. the bathroom reeks
and yet still... you are... so full of crap
but dont worry dear... cos ill get you back





bed time's near... and you think we'll play
but no way darlin... theres non today
a final coffee...and you drink it gone
that was a doze of trazadone





feeling drowsy... you've your teeth to do
with that very same brush... that i cleaned the loo
so nag complain and bitch and squeal
ill smile sweetly.. as you call to heel





now snoring hard ...to wake the dead
your belly empty... though you were fed
i grab my pillow... as i ponder through
what the law would do ... if i smothered you



........(hubby number two... turned out to be a total control freak, after id signed on the dotted line of course... and if your wondering how i could be an idiot twice theres a post knocking around some where that explains how you fall into that mind set... any way i wrote this as i was starting to feel quite ill (was after, i think, the second procedure (i lose track). i was supposed to be on bed rest but he wouldnt stop whining, complaining, bitching about everything .... did i really do all those things or am i using creative licence .... hell yes i did them... i was sick of his bullying... petty pay back like that kept me sane.. if you think that was bad you should hear what i did after the separation lol...yes i am an wicked mean evil woman.)
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hmm makes me look a bit of a bitch really huh need something else for balance perhaps?
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